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35 Signs You’ve Been Watching Too Much ‘Doctor Who’

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By DEVON IVIE

I was first introduced to Doctor Who when I was in high school — wanting to procrastinate from an array of calculus equations and Renaissance art history write-ups, I searched the television for a worthy distraction. Punching random numbers into the clicker, I stumbled upon a previously unknown television station: BBC America.


Currently occupying the screen is a lanky gentleman in a long brown coat. He is handsome. He has a beautiful blonde companion. He has sexy hair. He is negotiating with what appears to be a plunger toting silver-studded robot on why not to blow up Earth. He is getting annoyed with the constant echoes of EXTERMINATE!!! EXTERMINATE!!!, but maintains his obvious swag. This. Is. AMAZING!!! I refuse to blink in fear of missing something. My heart is racing. My cat Purrrfessor, frustrated, leaves when he realizes I have replaced petting him with groveling in front of television.

Of course, the actor was David Tennant and his companion was Billie Piper, both of whom ended up being the heroes of my remaining high school years. Doctor Who has progressed much since then – Matt Smith became the quirky eleventh Doctor, Karen Gillan charmed the world with her ginger feistiness, and Stephen Moffat (aka the man who makes millions of fangirls cry) became the show’s widely praised frontrunner – among many other noteworthy things. To this day, I’m still a hardcore Whovian (much to the chagrin of some of my friends) and here’s a list to see if you are, too:


9. You mourned the day Stephen Moffat left Twitter.

17. You’re getting increasingly suspicious that iPhones are the real world parallel to ATMOS. WAS STEVE JOBS A SONTARAN? (Really?)

23. You admit that Love & Monsters was a really shitty episode and pretend it doesn’t exist.

29. You wish Mark Gatiss was your sassy gay best friend.


32. You feel you have advanced knowledge of every historical figure that has appeared on the show (Madame de Pompadour, Vincent van Gogh, Agatha Christie, etc.).



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(Seriously tho, I laughed reading this whole list, since all of it is about the revival. EDIT: I get it people, this is shite, but we have so many articles which harken to the classic series that having one just about the new one isn't bad, it's a wider perspective.)


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